Friday, February 7, 2020

Perdu et Trouvé

Le ven. 27 déc. 2019 à 05:09, <Luke> a ecrit: 
<On Fri. Dec. 27, 2019 at 5:09 a.m., Luke wrote:>
salut j'ai mangé au restaurant hier soir vers 21h. nous étions un groupe de 5 à l'arrière. J'ai laissé mes bretelles en plastique dans une serviette rouge. j'aimerais venir les chercher si possible. à quelle heure arrivez-vous le matin? merci, luke  

<Hi, I ate at the restaurant last night around 9:00 PM. We were a group of five in the back. I left my plastic braces in a red napkin. I'd like to come and get them if I can. What time do you get in in the morning? thanks, luke.>

From: Yibol Yibol
To: Luke
December 27, 2019 at 3:34 AM
Re:  perdu et trouvé
<lost and found>

Bonjour ! Nous ouvrons a 11h30. Je ne suis pas celui qui a nettoyé les tables hier soir. Elles doivent cependant toujours être là.
 
<Hello! We open at 11:30. I'm not the one who cleaned the tables last night. They still have to be there, though.>

I was happy to hear the Chinese restaurant’s reply but dreaded the consequences. The night before when I went to brush my teeth and realized my plastic braces were missing, I frantically rifled through the pockets of everything I wore... then ran to the restaurant sockless to see if they were still open... the restaurant was closed and would not open for another 12 hours. Most people call a restaurant to order food or make reservations or ask about opening hours. I left messages in Chinese and French on their answering machine asking permission to dig through their trash looking for my braces. I couldn’t sleep well. When I awoke, I looked at their social media accounts and found an email which led to the following exchange above. No instant reply. My mind began to mull over all the possible outcomes. Were my braces in a large trash bag with raw chicken bones and slimy raw meat trimmings? Or were they gently placed at the top of a small trash can? Did I sound like a lunatic leaving all these messages In foreign languages? 


At 11 AM I tapped on their window and spoke in Chinese. Forget this French bullshit. I needed to communicate and not be misunderstood. Not knowing the words for braces I told the worker I lost my false teeth the night before. The worker showed me a trash can in the back. There were cooks and other people looking at me amused while I rummaged through it. I recognized the cans of coconut water and soy milk that our table ordered but no napkin with plastic braces. Tant pis. She then showed me the trash can in the front. This trash was not dry. It was a melange of wet paper towels, soup vegetables, bits and pieces of leftover food, plastic containers. I stuck my hand in and asked for another trash bag. I started emptying the contents of one trash into another... methodically opening each folded napkin to try to find my braces. No luck initially. Every layer of trash I unpeeled, I got more and more disgusted until I found my treasure. My braces... damp with Chinese food detritus.... 

I walked out the store kind of happy I found them and kind of worried about the prospect of putting the braces back in my mouth, the owner laughed and offered me a bottle of hand sanitizer to wash it. I thought maybe the chemicals of hand sanitizer may react strangely to the polymers of my braces. At the grocery store, with one hand clenching dirty braces I looked for the cheapest toothbrush and mouthwash. Upon return to the apartment I scrubbed the braces with toothpaste, then dunked them in mouthwash, then rinsed it... when I still had misgivings about putting them in my mouth, I soaked them again in mouthwash... then brushed them in dish soap. I spent 40 minutes scrubbing but and soaking the braces before I finally relented and put them into my mouth. They felt tight around my teeth, as the positions of my teeth felt loosened without braces for the night. Nobody would do this except for me I thought. The kids at this point were awake and stirring. I was truly ready to trash talk teenage boys.


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